07 July 2015

Self respecting Southerners

Pro Aris Et Focis, Coming St., Charleston, SC  
Just for kicks and giggles I asked Google about "self respecting Southerners" and this is what we came up with:
  • No self-respecting southerner uses instant grits
  • And one thing no self-respecting southerner should be caught without a properly stocked bar.
  • After all, no self-respecting Southerner would dare vote for a Northerner
  • No self-respecting Southerner would hop aboard a boat wearing black slacks.
  • No self-respecting Southerner would think of leaving fresh pineapples out of their Christmas decorations
  • No self-respecting Southerner would ever be without cheese straws
  • No self respecting Southerner makes cornbread from a box” 
  • No self-respecting Southerner, I boldly say, would let New Year's Day pass without at least one bite of black- eyed peas
  • No self respecting southerner would say "ya'll guys"
  • No self-respecting Southerner uses any mayo besides Duke's 
  • No self respecting southerner would eat the biscuits you get out of a peel and pop tube
  • No self-respecting Southerner who would serve baked possum would serve it without sweet potatoes
  • No self-respecting Southerner would ever put bread crumbs in their macaroni & cheese
  • No self- respecting southerner would be so rude as to hang up before saying a proper thank-you, followed by a goodbye
Thank you, and goodbye!


William Kendall said...

Quite a list!

Grits and cornbread are two peculiarities I've never had.

Or baked possum!

Cotton Boll Conspiracy said...

No self-respecting Southerner would ever spell y'all as "ya'll." Google must have pulled its listed from a Southerner who doesn't respect him or herself.

Joan said...

I must admit to a few of these... cornbread, grits, biscuits, and a courteous end to phone calls. Decorating with pineapples isn't a custom in my part of the South but I'm aware of it. Glaring omissions from the list are decent iced tea, really good peach cobbler, wonderful pound cake for every occasion as well as "just because" and a delicious and gorgeous coconut cake for Christmas. :)

Catalyst said...

Nothing about the confederate flag or statues of Southern generals, I see.

Charlestonjoan said...

You got that right! That one slipped right by me.

Charlestonjoan said...

Google was searching far and wide. It does sound like most of the quotes relate to food and drink so they were probably from articles promoting something.

Charlestonjoan said...

Mmmmm.....I made a peach cobbler last night with some good Eutawville peaches.

Charlestonjoan said...

I can't say I've been introduced to the possum myself but I have definitely made cornbread and grits. I make sure every Canadian visitor is offered she-crab soup and shrimp and grits.

Jack said...

And . . . exactly why were you googling "no self-respecting Southerner"? And what else did you google?

Charlestonjoan said...

You'd be amazed at what I google. I hope no one ever needs to track my searches. I would look like a very strange person.